Primitive Brain Lesson 4:
Primitive Brain in the Real World
Now you are aware of what women are looking for from you, and what the core of their primitive drivers are demanding of a mate. We have covered how you are influenced by your primitive drivers and how your brain is using the primitive defense mechanisms in its attempt to protect you. We have even covered for you how to create sexual tension with women you are interested in by knowing the secret to delivering your raw and primitive message like a broadcast and mastering creating sexual tension. Now, we are going to give you some real world influences of primitive brain.
Not all of the information we are going to share with you in this lesson is going to apply specifically to the approaching and attracting women, but as you are aware we also want to arm you with the tools and understanding to keep the girl. Having some understanding of what to expect in the future also deepens your understanding of women and with that knowledge comes the confidence that you are going to be able to deliver a Better Deal than she has ever experienced with any other male just as your primitive brain is demanding it says “choose me over all other males!”
Let’s start with an interesting fact. Common knowledge says that men are more visual than women. We agree, but not in the same aspect as common belief. You see visual processes are actually heightened through chemical release for men when they are focused on something desirable. This primitive wiring was selected by evolution to continue to be present because this chemical reward encourages the male to focus on the mate and “proves” to him that there is reason for her to be the focus of his attentions and instigating him to demonstrate to her that he is a worthy mate. This is why men are far more susceptible to “love at first site” than women.
Women on the other hand have developed over the same period of time and evolution has selected a natural weariness of being tricked or fooled. Remember, if she were to be duped and he got what he wanted and then abandoned her; she and her child would likely be ousted and that means death. This is the natural battle of the sexes and now you understand her primitive drive to be suspicious and cautious.
Developmental psychologists believe that the female brain’s extreme ability to connect through reading faces, interpreting tones and voice, and registering the nuances of emotion are traits that were selected evolutionarily from the time of the stone age. These traits are believed to be selected and made it possible for the female brain to pick up cues from non-verbal infants to anticipate needs and of course danger to herself and to her young. This innate skill is used today for the same reason, but women also exercise this skill in the interpersonal interactions with other females as well as males. This is why that first interaction or even the first date is an interesting experience for most guys. They have no idea how to present themselves non-verbally to ease this primitive alarm system.
In this writer’s opinion woman’s intuition is not a mystical message delivered only to the blessed, it is a biological response. Sort of a physical way for the primitive brain to communicate with the conscious mind. This is why women have seemingly mystical powers and ability to read people’s minds and to feel someone else’s feelings. Men did not develop this skill to the extent of women and truthfully it is to our disadvantage in today’s world. All of these skills are hardwired into the female brain and were created to support the survival of the female of the species. It makes sense right, if they could “read the minds” of others they could get an early warning of the intentions of an aggressor or malicious intent of a predator.
It is not that we as men are not capable, we have the skill. We are just not as proficient. Even the range of our vision as we discussed in earlier lessons is not designed to support this behavior. It is in our best interest to utilize other skill sets available to us to close this gap. This is true from the first moment we meet throughout the entire relationship. (see getting into her movie)
Speaking of emotions we thought it would be helpful for you to understand some basic differences as to how our brains develop and process information differently then women. One simple example is the way that the physical response to anger is processed. You see men process anger from stimulus or area of the brain that recognizes anger to the physical response. Whereas a woman recognizes anger in the same area of the brain as men, but instead of being routed directly to the physical it actually travels through a filter. It runs through in essence an intelligent filter and emerges as a good or bad. With your new knowledge I am sure you can put it together as to why the male and the female would process this emotion differently. Women would need to ensure that they could manage verbal acuteness at least long enough to make sure that her response would not stimulate or direct the anger of the male at her or worse panic the males and have their physical response directed at her or her young. Whereas if the early caveman took the time to think about why he was angry or if it was good or bad he might already be victim to the predator or attacker. He needed at that time to react instantly.
The bad part is that in today’s world reacting instantly is typically the worst thing you can do so now the women’s filter is so much more useful and the issue lies that as she is able to take one step back and filter the situation the male’s verbal affluence is not able to keep up. Male intelligence is overwhelmed by the rush of the fight or flight response and breakdown is sometimes eminent. If not for the higher thought processes and societal restrictions that put that animal in check we would live in a society of men reacting as if they were physically attacked every time they experienced any level of anger.
This is important for you to understand, because it is not only anger that has a pathway from emotion to physical response for us as men it is really any intense feeling including positive or exciting feelings. This is why men jump up when elated and women seem to hesitate just a bit. I find this so interesting because this information helps you to understand why you react the way you do and gives you the ammunition to put your response in check. This is true from approach to dealing with conflict with a woman that you enjoy. More on this in the conflict resolution course.
In the married and long term relationship lessons and courses, we teach those guys the applicable areas of primitive brain that has influence in their relationships. We talk about the brain chemical responses that women have for example when children are involved as well as how the long term bonding chemicals that are influencing the direction of the relationship. It is important for you to understand one very key point that we talked about earlier, but fits in here. The rush of the love chemical PEA is an incredible experience and there are millions of men that suffer from extreme loneliness because they are constantly chasing that rush of the new relationship. As soon as they feel that rush fading they jump ship. What they don’t understand is that it is perfectly natural and necessary for that rush to fade and it does it in phases, but it is replaced and the new set of stimulants is designed to support you long term emotionally and gives you the ability to direct your focus elsewhere. And though it may not be an out of control emersion it is still very satisfying and of course stimulating.
The issue is that most men have no concept of how to keep that flow of new chemicals occurring and growing. You are the only one that can save yourself from this torturous existence. You must learn to bring a constant stimulus to your woman so that so in return she can provide that for you. One of the key needs for a man is that he needs to be physically touched 3 to 4 times more than a woman to stimulate those long term feel good chemicals. This is why it is critical that you accept her touches. She is hardwired to reach out to you because she may not consciously know why she wants to touch you, but her primitive brain knows that if she doesn’t you are going to fade. At first this is easy, but as the relationship hits the first phase which is 5 to 8 months, you are going to need her to step it up and the only way she will step it up is if you take the lead. Funny huh? Most guys go the absolute opposite way about this. They are on fire for the first 3 to 6 months, but then they fade and they don’t even know why. The reason is because they have entered the first natural phase of the relationship and if they want to have the fire and passion to continue it is on them to make it happen.
Think about it, if we never came out of that blur of desire and passion for each other we would never accomplish any of the tasks necessary for the survival of the species, we would hold up in the bedroom until we were dead.
The next big push happens somewhere between the 1 ½ year mark and the 3 year mark depending on the couple. Again the solution is that the male in the relationship needs to adjust the way that he is interacting with her and what he is doing to stimulate her desire to interact with him. Don’t worry we have you covered when you get to that point in your relationships, but knowing that this is the direction it is going to take gives you the edge that helps you to have that passionate sex filled relationship that you want and hear about. It isn’t even difficult to do, but it does take the knowledge to be aware of what is happening. You see now you know why so many marriages fail in the first five years. It has little to do with the people or the love dying; it has to do with the male not understanding what is happening. The female will respond and support the mission because that is what she is hardwired to do.
You see women find a ton of validation in the success of the relationship, because if the male in the relationship is putting in effort and creating an environment for her to be safe in it is unlikely that he is doing that for any other female.
Just as men find so much validation in sex. If she is not having sex with you there is the possibility that she is having sex with someone else is the way your primitive brain translates it. We are hardwired to want to make sure that doesn’t happen, but if she is having sex with you and she is touching you in public and demonstrating to all the other males around that she is with you, that she chooses you over them as her mate; the male is validated. Sex is so much more than the enjoyment of getting some action. It is the core of our primitive drive to propagate. As the male of the species of course you want her to choose to carry your seed!
We hope that you have a much stronger understanding of the influence of the primitive brain on your success with women. This is the basics, we will continue to expand your knowledge and to support you to use this powerful and underutilized tool.
Please feel free to ask us questions on this topic. It is incredibly diverse and a very dynamic area of what we teach. It unfortunately is impossible for us to teach you everything about it in one learning course. It is also impossible for us to target a specific area in anyone’s life in a basic lesson. We understand that you might have questions.