Predicting Bachelorette Emily’s Likely Choice

…based on only 30 Second Intros

by Christian Hellmers and Team

NOTE from The First 10 Minutes Team…

First of all let me say that it’s tough to approach a woman under any circumstance, let alone on national tv in front of the world after already knowing something about your date.  We’re here to provide observations to enhance awareness for all men to elevate them to appreciate connecting deeper with a woman.  We define masculinity similar to David Deida, in that it is the observer, the watcher, the unwavering consciousness that holds the space for the light and love of the feminine.  It isn’t simply strength, but more like the banks of a river holding its flow.  Our observations come from the heart and mind, not to poke fun but rather to draw awareness for the best way to connect.


Top 7 Probabilities/Standings (after week 1)

1) Ryan 33% chance

2) Arie 20% chance

3) Charlie 10% chance

4) Doug 10% chance

5) Sean 8% chance

6) Nate 5% chance

7) Alessandro 5% chance



We’re confident Emily chooses one of these 7 in the end, more than likely one of the top 2.  We’ll learn more about the men as we go on but these appear to be the most capable men.

* Ryan is a clear standout and fits well based on masculine presence, profession (working with children), creativity, social awareness, and confidence.  The only thing that could disqualify him is any anger management issues.  It’s clear that some men hide this well and she has already expressed her concerns about anger from the past season.

* Arie has a unique connection because he comes from the same sport as her daughter’s father, but that might be harder on her than she thinks.  Nevertheless, he has a calm presence, owns his body language above par, and appears sensitive to meet her emotional needs.

* Charlie has a great physical visual masculine presence.  He hasn’t shown that he can relate to her as a man’s man yet.  Keep in mind Emily’s subconscious will be comparing all of the men as lovers, fathers, and friends.  Since she has done parenting on her own for so long, the role of her partner as a father figure will be vital.

* Chris appears to be someone who will go far, BUT I don’t see him as a great fit for her because he’s not masculine enough.   Chris or Doug could even go all the way to the end, get crushed, and become the next Bachelor.  Kalon could go far as well but he won’t be trusted in the end to be her daughter’s father due to immaturity.

* Sean comes across as a kind sensitive man who is ultra sincere.  I don’t know enough about him to be able to size him up fully but he appears capable of being a father and a man from first interactions.

* Nate is a wild card as we don’t know much other than he’s calm and cool.

* Alessandro is also a foreign gentleman which may win her over if he can embody a fatherly role.


Masculine Scoring on Initial  30 Second Approach




Summary of First 30 Seconds Performance

* Well dressed, nice color choice

* Seems too into her looks alone

* Had a good strategy of making it short and sweet; no mistakes

Masculine Approach Score


TIP- Be bold about something specifically beautiful inside her.  This shows you are paying full attention.






Summary of First 30 Seconds Performance

* well dressed, nice outfit

* grabs her hands to show he can take charge, good but he kinda overdid it

* hugged her like his grandmother and had eyes like deer in headlights which is scary

* looked a bit shellshocked, not really smiling, great eye contact upon leaving

* talked about his boy a bit too much, came across as desperate, but it was a safe topic to connect on at first

* more logical in forming his connection, less emotional which is critical to her feeling safe

* notice that she shook her head from side to side when she said “I’m so glad you’re here”

Masculine Approach Score


Tip: Breath deep before approaching and pretend that you are in a time warp where life is happening much slower than it appears.  This helps you breathe more getting more oxygen to the brain to reduce heart rate and anxiety.






Summary of First 30 Seconds Performance
* feminine color choice for shirts reduces his masculinity

* already skinny, he must recognize that his masculinity will be challenged

* he missed her hand upon first connecting

* too focused on his routine, overly rehearsed, not adapting to her

* kissed her hand immediately putting her on a pedestal and him beneath her

* great eye contact on walk

* compliments on her looks, too ordinary

* He states “Thank you so much” as if he doesn’t deserve to be there (he’s too taken back by her looks)

Masculine Approach Score
Tip: Dress with darker colors if you know she will be looking gorgeous to avoid accidentally stealing attention.  Attention is best directed on the feminine person to create balance.






Summary of First 30 Seconds Performance

* youthful shirt, colors of high vibration, slightly feminine

* walks slow and side to side which is original and pleasant, stands out

* immediately smiles but too happy like a kid in a candy store

* hugs her fast but then almost treats her like a mother

* great eye contact all the way through

* “Emily, I’m Sean” was one of the best simple openers.  Short and real.  No BS.

* Voice cracked slightly at one point but smiling made him appear friendly and cool

* Slow hug and slow speech make him easy to feel safe with

* He played it safe and smart going first and showing he doesn’t need to impress

* Notice the high pitch in her voice and look back at his backside (she’s attracted)

* During his line “I’d like to get to know you a bit” his eye contact is authentic and real

* Emily also almost checks her teeth if she has lipstick on them to triple check she’s presentable; signifies interest

Masculine Approach Score


Tip: Focus your intention laser-like to her needs.  In this case, take this approach as if you are her hubby and the father of her child.  Don’t take any woman’s needs lightly and over-practice if anything.






Summary of First 30 Seconds Performance

* smart clever entrance all the way through

* it created an easy way to talk without the pressure of “what do i say first”

* smiling throughout, very unique hairstyle that will factor into her initial attraction

* she dug the way he smelled which is a great sign and allowed her to ignore the usual distractions (tapping into a different scent leaves a huge mark)

* slow walk which is original

* Jef ignores her remark about wanting to ride the skateboard and quickly jumps to a point about not falling to show he’s not cocky…very smooth to not be at her beck and call, just yet 😉

* notice how Jef is also so tuned in that he actually responds to her appreciation with a “your welcome”, many of the men struggle to hold an actual conversation

* he ends it by saying thanks twice which is a bit awkward because he appears rushed to leave, but it doesn’t disrupt his masculinity too much

* Emily tells him he looks great because he hasn’t gone crazy into his feminine, allowing her to be in her feminine flow of radiating love

* Later in the show (after the first 30 seconds), she says “He makes me feel like a nerd.”  That signified Jef is not husband material if you ask us!

Masculine Approach Score


Tip: Be aware of how you will be perceived.  We are a product of the media’s repetitive images.  If you could be considered goofy, balance it out by being serious at times.  Always show diversity in yourself which illustrates awareness.






Summary of First 30 Seconds Performance

* conservatively dressed and buttons up after getting out to show that she’s important

* a bit slow to approach her and pulls back before hugging, shows he’s not desperate

* doesn’t have much to say, keeps it simple, 2 compliments were quick and more spontaneous than others

* comes across as genuine and sincere

Masculine Approach Score


Tip: Be sure to initiate physical contact in appropriate places, early on.  Show her that you want her by risking rejection.






Summary of First 30 Seconds Performance

* walks slow, strong masculine presence with his body

* decent opener “You don’t expect me to do that.” shows that he’s tuned into the moment, not rehearsed.

* she grabs his hand and initiates the hug since he doesn’t appear needy or overly giddy

* she clearly wants more

* “Yes mam” is a bit awkward but shows he will treat her like a lady so it works well too

*  Relates to her about not slipping and falling as a way to go into a safe zone before going deeper which is okay, kinda feminine

* Played it safe and didn’t make any mistakes but also didn’t differentiate himself much other than non-verbally

Masculine Approach Score


Tip: Be polite but not too polite.  If you come across as a butler or servant, you will be considered overly feminine by nature.  Serve the feminine but don’t worship, at first.






Summary of First 30 Seconds Performance

* well dressed in masculine colors

* voice was a bit muffled

* hesitates to hug which shows lack of emotional IQ or availability

* strange eye movements

* somewhat safer to say that he doesn’t know much about her, but it could also show he doesn’t do his homework

* poor choice of words “I look forward to talking with you” and no eye contact make it seem business-like

Masculine Approach Score


Tip: Focus your eyes on her left eye.  By choosing one eye it will keep you focused on her and not your words.






Summary of First 30 Seconds Performance

* super loud and opens by clapping which is awkward especially considering her usual calm demeanor (no NLP awareness)

* original guy which makes him stand out

* has a jester-like presence to him, walks like he’s doing aerobics, slightly immature in this context, borderline obnoxious

* “Alright”, “What do you say…excited”  were both unusual phrases that indicate he’s confused about how to relate on a deep emotional level

* comes across as if he’s still in college or in a fraternity, but he’s spontaneous which is ultra attractive

* great spirit, but his big kid persona will be tough to translate into a mature responsible father figure for Emily’s daughter

Masculine Approach Score


Tip: Be original but know your audience.  Tune in to their sense of humor and their perspective.  Ask a friend or trusted person for feedback if you get awkward looks.  It’s all about context.






Summary of First 30 Seconds Performance

* one of the best dressed, with gray and black masculine colors

* shared with Emily his nickname of the “Wolf” which hurts his fatherhood potential, no reason to tell her that at that point

* overly excited and interrupts her a bit

* he’ll ride his looks as long as they can take him, but perhaps he’s got more depth in a different context

Masculine Approach Score


Tip: Watch your words.  Be careful of what you say or share with women vs. with the fellas.  Women pay close attention and use their intuition more than men.






Summary of First 30 Seconds Performance

* well dressed and comes across highly masculine

* kinda intense but sweet with his opener, albeit over the top as if he worships her without knowing her

* great tone of voice and speaks at a medium pace which is ultra attractive

* he declares that she’s everything he wants which is a no-no, immediately putting him beneath her before discovering their connection in reality

* Emily never got a chance to share much with him because he talked way too much, as if he’s already decided she’s his

* interrupted her to tell her how she is good for him coming across as too logical, not enough emotion or sharing

Masculine Approach Score


Tip: Listen.  Listen.  Listen.  Don’t think about what you want to say next.  Play off the interaction and allow her to ask questions.  Women care more about process than destination with words.






Summary of First 30 Seconds Performance

* over the top with his entrance creates a huge separation from her emotionally; it was more about him than her

* she doesn’t hug him, he also chooses to shake hands to keep his distance, indicating emotional unavailability

* Emily has her hands on her hips as if she’s scolding him for being so ridiculous with his entrance

* His eye contact and word choice of “I promise it’s worth the wait” triggers he to swing her shoulders which shows she’s forgiven him

* Great use of eye contact and tonality to create serious intense energy

* well dressed but overly showcasing his thin body inhibits his masculinity

* worst hugger and shows no connection beneath the upper chest signifying emotional challenges to get close

* comes across as a player type which will earn him her attention as all girls love bad boys until they get hurt enough

Masculine Approach Score


Tip: Be yourself as if it were a Sunday morning.  Don’t over extend yourself to impress.  Humility is the most attractive force on earth.






Summary of First 30 Seconds Performance

* outfit a bit feminine

* stiff armed hug shows less comfort in his body

* she reaches for his hands which is a plus

* she enjoys his smell which is a plus

* he’s aloof and keeps her wanting more which is masculine (not needing anything)

* she utters “He’s so cute” under her breath since so she’s attracted

* nothing fancy, but nothing needed since she was infatuated with him

Masculine Approach Score


Tip: Relax your body when connecting.  The more fluid you present yourself, the more attractive.  By moving slow with your hands and arms, it maximizes safety.






Summary of First 30 Seconds Performance

* Great balance of masculine and feminine energy

* Speaks slow and deep which is highly masculine

* Gives her a simple yet creative sign while pretending to be confused, simply awesome!

* Shows that he can be sweet and she tilts her head receiving his gift

* She ends the exchange by asking him to hold up the sign which is another indication of appreciation

* Conversation and banter is real and comfortable, nothing awkward about it which shows his security

Masculine Approach Score


Tip: Be inquisitive.  Challenge her softly at first, gently and playfully to create invisible tension.  Women love to ride the roller-coaster of emotions, especially at first.






Summary of First 30 Seconds Performance

* great eye contact out of limo

* masculine colors, well dressed

* long hair will likely trigger her to perceive him as sensitive which can help earn trust

* bringing her a gift is a great idea, the guitar pic is ordinary yet clever, not overly emotional which is good

* the name “Music Mike” is a bit childish and partially feminine which hurts his chances, it also implies she might forget his name which shows lack of confidence

* she’s grateful for his gift but might just put him in the friend zone as a “nice guy” slash younger brother

* he doesn’t make eye contact on the last hug so he was either nervous or shy, both hurt his chances

Masculine Approach Score


Tip: End your exchanges with passionate looks or touch.  Encourage her to visualize the depth of your intensity.






Summary of First 30 Seconds Performance

* poppy green shirt is a bit awkward and evokes less emotion, more playfulness, more youthfulness

* dancing routine puts him in his feminine as he lacks masculinity as his core way of being

* she will be intimidated since she doesn’t know how to dance, thus he must teach her which can be a good thing, but not about feminine expressions such as dance

* comes across more as an entertainer than a lover; he’s got a big mountain to climb to prove that he’s a man’s man to be a father and to make her feel safe as a professional entertainer

* dancing was goofy and silly which broke the ice well, but better to play this card after you have shown her your masculine side first

* no hugging upon his departure speaks volumes about his emotional immaturity and her lack of desire

* compliments her as he walks away, but it was too late to realize he wasn’t opening his full attention on her, rather turning it on himself as a way to get through the moment

Masculine Approach Score


Tip: Leave her wanting more by not showing all your cards at once.  Be selective about when you reveal what.  Recognize context and when to showcase your appropriate skills.






Summary of First 30 Seconds Performance

* grandma suit was clever yet incompatible with her conservative style, she’s looking for Clooney, Connery, or Bond, not Ace Ventura

* awesome outfit, great vest, masculine presence

* slightly nervous delivery after the costume came off, forgets to introduce himself which is “cute” but lacked masculinity

* genuine man but needed to show he had more seriousness as she’s evaluating him based on fatherhood ready skills

Masculine Approach Score


Tip: Be bold but also recognize the context.  Safety and social awareness must come before bold moves.






Summary of First 30 Seconds Performance

* feminine colored shirt

* handshake before hug shows he’s a bit uncertain about his emotional availability

* you can tell he’s nervous, not surprising considering his choice of how to express his thoughts on connecting via carrying an egg to show his focus

* voice is high and quivering

* “I will take care of this egg like I will take care of you and Rickie” comment shows he’s far removed from social awareness and fatherhood (flour babies were carried in 7th grade)

* “Yeahhhh” in a high voice exposed too much femininity and will repel most women unless you make fun of yourself immediately after

Masculine Approach Score


Tip: Listen to yourself on tape.  Notice how loud or deep your voice sounds.  Practice talking freely in high pressure situations to work out the kinks and to build endurance.  Everyone gets nervous at some point.






Summary of First 30 Seconds Performance

* light purple shirt is highly feminine

* carrying a slipper is highly overdramatic, awkward, and silly

* getting down on one knee without even interacting much is worship, not love

* had he chosen to joke about it, the concept might have worked but he actually believed he was a prince!

* turned the focus too much on himself rather than her

* Emily’s remarks about loving love and shoes puts him in the category of a gay friend or shoe salesmen

* she forgot his name indicating less interest in romance

Masculine Approach Score


Tip: Be sure not to come across as a groupie.  If you appear to be worshiping someone, they will doubt that you see the real them past their looks.






Summary of First 30 Seconds Performance

* smart dresser

* went in for handshake and not hug, more business-like until she insisted

* quite reserved

* came across as more of her father since he offered to advise her on how to remember his name with a nametag, how awkward?

* conversation was ordinary, seemed more like a brother or father, no sexual tension

Masculine Approach Score


Tip: Don’t go in for a handshake if you are seeking to be romantic with someone.  It’s too ordinary and highly impersonal.   Hug and hug often so that it’s natural for you.






Summary of First 30 Seconds Performance

* immediately goes into spiritual connection which is intense but truthful which can be good for con

* showed that he’s serious about life and that he’s there for a serious connection, but seems needy saying “I pray to God that you do [give me a chance]”

* comes across as if he needs help in being more masculine, asking his Dad about how to approach, kinda corny

* lacks social savvy to be able to free flow and to dance in the conversation

* added lots of pressure, too much talking without giving her a chance to share

* sweet guy but too socially awkward for her to take him seriously

* the dolls could have backfired completely, but he pulled it off, but for how long…

Masculine Approach Score


Tip: Use your imagination but focus on creating art, rather than an outcome upon early stage interactions.  Women smell desperation a mile away.  If you dip into the beauty of the moment without being attached to an outcome, there’s less flow.






Summary of First 30 Seconds Performance

* nice outfit

* walked way too fast exuding nervous energy

* word choice was uncomfortable about challenging on “Who chose Charlotte?” when he knows who did

* made her back up which can create tension which is good but she’s too conservative to appreciate California play-hard-to-get games

* recovered soso by stating “I’m glad you are the Bachelorette” but he is referring to her as the Bachelorette and not a real person, losing out on emotional chemistry

* didn’t show any emotional attempts to connect which puts him in the ordinary camp

Masculine Approach Score


Tip: Walk slow.  Slow everything down.  By slowing it all down, you get more into the true moment.  Your routine will shift by slowing down time and your senses will become heightened.






Summary of First 30 Seconds Performance

* timed the hug perfectly

* snappy dresser with messy hair is catchy and stands out

* kissing on the cheek is bold and masculine, 3 times was slightly much for a conservative woman, but he showed he wasn’t creepy

* great smiler and introduced to her a new language which shows he has value, awesome move

* positive vibes shows that he would be fun, but is he daddy material?  hard to tell yet

* talked over her once and interrupted the flow but was sincere about it

Masculine Approach Score


Tip: Observe the way your potential partner reacts to your touch.  It might be jerky at first.  Be selective about frequency and location.  Always proceed with caution and build momentum.






Summary of First 30 Seconds Performance

* masculine colors with a touch of feminine with earrings

* led with his accent which was smart and offered value about his culture

* showed experienced as he hugged her well after grabbing her hand

* switched to perfect English to show diversity and education

* comes across as a bit slick which might be too much for her conservative nature

* great eye contact and looks intense with deep emotional interest

* supported her with a smile after her broken Spanish attempt, instead of correcting her

* seems non-judgy and lots of fun for a night out, but perhaps too much fun for fatherhood

* great eye contact upon departure and she even makes a Yummmm-like sound

Masculine Approach Score


Tip: Offer valuable knowledge.  The more you can share based on your truth, the more reason for you to be together in her eyes.






Summary of First 30 Seconds Performance

* kissing her hand is a bit much but his execution was solid

* smooth walk

* very serious which shows he can play the role of father

* might be too socially awkward for her friends; his rehearsed line is cheesy

* glasses were too intense and he was smart to take them off

* not smiling enough to make her feel truly connected

Masculine Approach Score


Tip: Rehearsed lines don’t work unless they come across as spontaneous.  Be sure you realize that relevant spontaneity demonstrates social awareness which demonstrates that you can help her preserve relationships.  Women are all about preserving relationships, thus you become an asset.


Great job gentlemen for taking the risk to be on the show and to put yourself out there in the name of love!