The First 5 Minutes is the 6th most important time-frame in a potential romantic sequence.
Why The First 5 Minutes Matters…
- > Here is a chance to show that you are socially savvy and aware. All it takes is one mistake and the prospect will believe you are creepy or unsafe, even though it may be far from the case. Living socially strong means knowing boundaries and tells, reading the little things that mean a lot. If you can turn on your right brain, you will succeed in connecting deeper in the moment spontaneously which is ultra attractive, since most covet this capability.
- > Here is also a great chance to learn and share. This is the best chance to make references to your gifts in a casual strategic manner. If you do not share valuable information about what makes you unique, then you could easily miss out on an opportunity to go further had he or she known that about you. This is why your outfit and accessories mean everything. It’s much less cocky to show who you are than to tell who you are, but both work in the first few minutes to keep the connection going.
- > If you haven’t applied appropriate touch on the dating prospect’s arm or shoulder or hand, then this is another great opportunity to show serious interest
A sample of our suggested practices for The First 5 Minutes…
- > SHARE YOUR UNIQUE SELF in ways that aren’t ordinary. Don’t just say that you play guitar or piano. Hand her/him a copy of a CD or describe your style of musical talent. If you simply state, “I play guitar” and keep it too aloof. Then you might be taken as a phony or as average. The more imagery and expression used to describe who you are, the more authentic it comes across. If you can talk about anything on a roll for more than a minute, then it’s construed as a serious passion. It is the passions in life that bring us together to co-create. If he/she adores music or loves the idea of attending music shows, then odds are in your favor for a number close.
- > Grab your accessories that highlight your identity and play with them “accidentally.” In the case of being a guitar player, why not carry a few picks around with you or make a necklace with a guitar pick as a charm. Don’t hide your talents. Share them strategically. You could even pretend to play guitar off the arm of your prospect (if it was spontaneous) as a playful act. It might come across as cheesy if you do it too for too long, but the idea is to initiate who you are through a demonstration, and not just words. You could hum a tune or slam your hand on your thigh to show her/him that you are indeed a gifted passionate musician!
- > List 5-10 questions that you will ask a prospect to introduce the possibility of a connection in that area of interest or passion, whether it’s your line of work, your hobbies, your family, or some other unique differentiators. For example, you could ask someone “Do they love a type of obscure music, do they hike in a certain area, do they travel to select foreign countries, do they eat certain cuisine, do they dance, do they like a certain speaker.” You get the idea. The more targeted the question to your interests, the better. Your intention is to find overlap in niche areas to give him/her a reason to give you their digits or pick up the phone when you call. If you keep it too broad, you might get the number as a courtesy, but you likely won’t get the time of day later.
- > If you haven’t applied appropriate touch on the dating prospect’s arm or shoulder or hand, then this is another great opportunity to show serious interest. The only way someone knows if you like them is if you show them. Women doubt connections often according